The problem of spanking children is as old as man is. Some parents consider spanking to be the most effective tool to teach values to kids but they don’t know that this modern era of rapid change demands more effective discipline techniques to avoid spanking.
Following discipline techniques to avoid spanking can help you bringing your child on right track:
Praise your child for good things
It is good idea that you should praise your child, but, sometimes, it seems like you have to work hard to catch your child being good. There is value of the effort since praise is a very effective way to inspire your child.
It’s a good idea praising the behavior and not the child as you may say, “I like the way how nicely you put your clothes away. Your room looks superb!” It’s essential to keep it genuine and fresh so that your child may feel happiness and consider you the best and superb parent.
Ignore misbehavior, not child
Dear parents, you must remember that you’re ignoring the misbehavior, not the child. This will bring your child close to you that is the sign of gladness for you.
Time out- a fantastic techniques to avoid spanking
Behold! Time out (it means, you as a parent give specific time to your child to do the task, failing which will take some facility from her) works best if it is used to shape behavior rather than punish it. It not only stops misbehavior but also gives, both child and parent, time to reflect. Make sure that you have arranged your child in such a way; she connects the behavior with the time out. It’s important that you stay calm and shun shouting as you guide the child to the time out area.
Face consequences of her choices
You should teach your child how to understand the consequences. Your child learns self-discipline by experiencing the consequences of her choices.
Learning from mistakes
We know well that we all learn best from our own mistakes. This trick, of course, is to avoid risky and expensive mistakes. When you assume that this won’t be dangerous, you should state your opinion, then step back and let the consequences teach your child. In this method, your child learns to take responsibility for her behavior.
Motivate your child by rewarding
Motivate your child by rewarding charts, certificates, and other prizes which can boost the energy level of your child. These are all the discipline techniques to avoid spanking and to set limits and get jobs done. You are to work with your child. Encourage your child in making the chart and daily entries.
Negotiate with your child
If you negotiate with your child wisely, your negotiation will help your child develop confidence in her viewpoint while learning how to stand up for her rights. If the session becomes a screaming or complaining one, you need to remind your child that you are the parent and not to be talked to in that tone. Now the discussion is over for today.
Technique of withdrawal of privileges
The technique of withdrawal of privileges works best when it is unsurprisingly linked with the behavior. You should utter such expressions, “If you ride your tricycle into the lane you will lose it for the rest of the day, etc.
8. Your approach to discipline plans is a very individual decision based on your parenting style, your child’s age and temperament, and the problems themselves. Your sensible parenting style will develop a great system for your child. You should try to find that your child is on to new situations that require different responses from you.
No matter what your child’s age is, one of the best gifts you can give her is the chance to grow up with both respect and limits, exactly what a good discipline program offers.
Reason behind discipline tactics to avoid spanking
Spanking teaches the wrong lesson to your child. Spanking teaches that when someone does something you don’t like, you hit them. When you as a parent hit your child, she does the same by hitting her siblings and I myself have experienced such things in my life. In fact, children who are spanked by their parents are more aggressive to other children.
Spanking doesn’t teach the parent the right lesson either if you think spanking works, spanking and other harsh physical punishment can easily become a habit. Children, sometimes, make parents very angry. When hitting becomes a habit, it is easier to lose control and seriously injure your child when you become angry.
Spanking doesn’t work as parents think it does; spanking may stop bad behavior for the moment, but probably not over the long term. For example, a boy who is spanked for hitting his sister may not hit her again if he knows Mom is watching. But this thing is repeated when mom is not watching it.
Spanking can hurt your relationship with your child as children don’t like being hit. Spanking can color your children’s feelings toward you, especially if you spank them frequently. This is important when children get older and start spending more time away from you – at school and with friends, for example. Then, it will no longer be the fear of being spanked that will keep them in line. Rather, it will be the strength and warmth of your relationship that will keep them on the right track.
In a nutshells
These discipline techniques to avoid spanking will prove very effective in handling tantrums of your child and you will start enjoying your parenting journey which is a wonderful experience on this planet earth.
By: Prof Ajmal Dass Jaipal