Knowledge about the types of parenting styles can be of paramount importance during your parenting journey. Do you know about the type of your parenting style? This article “Types of Parenting Styles” can help you both identify and improve your parenting style.
Types of Parenting Styles
It is an acknowledged fact that every person has some duties to perform which vary from time to time in different stages of life. Childhood duties are totally changed than that of boyhood, manhood and old age. Every stage has different duties and demands but among all of the stages, parenting stage is the most important stage and its duties are of great importance. If you as parents on this stage succeed in guiding your child toward true and successful path, it is everything for them.
Every parent wants to guide her child in the best possible way and hopes for the best. In this process, she adopts some methods or ways in growing up her child in good manners in order to prepare her to lead a happy and successful life. These methods or ways are called styles and every parent uses different styles to educate her child so that her child may bring positive change in her learning and behavior.
Many psychologists have given different parenting styles. I am going to describe them which are four in numbers or kinds. Read them carefully and attentively paying full concentration because it is the matter of your child’s development and future. It will help you a lot in this regard.
Being responsible parent, it is your obligation to opt the style that suits according to the situation in order to train your child in a good manner.
Parenting styles are the standard practices and strategies that parents use during their child rearing. Now let’s study the four parenting styles.
1 Authoritarian parenting style
In this style parent has high control but shows low warmth as she places high value on traditionalism and obedience. The parent is very strict on her child as her demands and expectations are high that she wants them to be fulfilled by her child. Child is not allowed to give her views or opinion and she is also not told the reasons of any behavior. If child tries to ask the reason, the parent replies her to follow the orders as she has been told and asking reason is not her concern.
This parenting style causes low result. It lowers child’s self-esteem and self-worth. She is not allowed to perform any daily activities as child is considered inferior. She wants to do something extraordinary as adult but parent treats her as a child. She has no choice as she is to follow parent’s orders and rules. She is discouraged and never encouraged that affects badly and causes psychological and mental disease.
She is unable to enjoy social environment and becomes physically weak due to stress. Strict discipline, one way communication and firm rules put negative effects on the child. The consequences of authoritarian parenting are very poor as child feels difficulty in making decisions as she has no choice. She just has to obey what is thrust from parents. The non- expressive tendency leads the child to rebel against her parent. This parenting style is against nature.
Parent’s aggressive attitude lacks warmth and comfort for her child. Parent is hostile toward her child and she is harsh and rigid in her discipline. Sometimes the parent uses abusive language and gives harsh punishment. The child is fearful of her home environment as she is mistrusted and preys to mental health issues.
Parent establishes rules expecting that the child will follow those rules. The child is not helped and guided in difficult challenges. If child challenges the rules, she is not given any reason for the rules. There is little room for negotiation between parent and child.
In this method, parent uses punishment instead of consequences method. There is low friendliness but high control and parent shows anger instead of making decision how to solve the problem.
As for as my suggestion is concerned, this parenting style is not suitable for you and your child.
2 Permissive parenting styles
This is 2nd parenting style and it is contrary to authoritarian parenting style. Parent shows high warmth and low control on the child. Child is given free hand to lead her own way as she likes. The parent makes low demands and rarely uses punishment because she is trying to play the role of friend rather than parent.
Mostly in this situation, child becomes overpowering and it is not easy for parent to control the situation as it is hard to pacify her child and manage the circumstances. Child is not mature enough to take responsibility in performing independent tasks.
The parent doesn’t offer her child much discipline. As she is lenient, she leaves the child on her own choice that causes behavior and attitude problems for her child. Parent talks to her child but doesn’t discourage her bad behavior.
3 Uninvolved parenting style/neglectful parenting style
In this parenting style, parent has low warmth and low control on her child. In this method the parent is independent, uninvolved and sometimes neglectful. The parent does not suggest her child if she needs her parent’s help or opinion to meet the crisis. Her parent makes very low demands as if she has no concern with her child.
Parent allows the child to learn from her own experiences. Parent focuses on her own needs.
Child finds it hard to form and sustain relationship with others and she gets poor achievements in school that creates high rate of problem in her behavior. The parent expects that her child should manage her matters herself in order to raise herself but the child has very little knowledge in this regard.
So, it is not convenient for the child to make life changing decision. As a result, whatever her child is doing in such circumstances can create problems for both of them. Child lacks guidance and no attention is paid on her by her parent.
4 Authoritative parenting styles
As sensible parent, she expresses high warmth to her child and has high control on her. This is the most suitable and ideal style in controlling the child and getting extra ordinary results. To her child, the parent gives reasonable demands that are easy to fulfill and achieve favorable results for her.
Parent sets limits and she consistently watches and keeps her child under such limits. She shows great warmth and affection for her child and listens to the child’s point of view. She uses the give and take formula as parent shows a little bit democracy in this way to get marvelous results.
There is dialogue between parent and child every day. Parent asks the child, “Why are you tired “or “What is the problem” etc. Parent encourages her child saying, “You have done the great job”. Both parent and child come to compromise each other as it is the most positive parenting style.
Parent has good behavior with the child. She listens to her point of view and takes it into account. The parent allows her child freedom but has consistent rules and boundary structure. She provides a secure environment and sets high standard of behavior and achievement for her child. In this parenting style, parent is warm and supportive. The child’s self-confidence increases and she becomes a socially competent child who has high self-esteem and gets good school grades also.
The child forms good relations with her parent and others which are solid and durable to sustain long term. The parent also has rules but there is some allowance to child. The child is told reasons for every mishap and the parent uses consequences method instead of punishment. The child becomes disciplined and she is happy as she is allowed to make decisions which increase her confidence level.
Resultantly, child confidently expresses her opinions.
Through authoritative parenting style, parent generates the best outcomes.
Three important messages (Types of Parenting Styles)
Three important messages that will bring good result in guiding your child are for your help.
The first message is that your job as parent is to love them no matter whatever condition arises because it will bring your child close to you and frankly she will share her problem or difficulty as she knows that you love her and take great care of her. This method will encourage your child to obey and trust you in every matter. Your love feelings will never cause any stress or mental or psychological problems for your child. Every day, remind your child that you love her and she is very important to you.
The second message is to assure your child that you as a parent are wise and experienced. If she has any question she has right to ask in order to get proper answer. Listen to the questions attentively that your child asks and give her proper answers. You are to give her opportunity to involve and invite her for wisdom in her life. Share your knowledge with your child by saying that you are waiting for her to share knowledge if she wants to listen.
The third message is very simple that is you are to say your child, “Hope for the best, my child”. In this method you should encourage your child and develop belief of hope and optimism in her. Ask her she should think positively and confidently that she can do what she wants as nature says, “you can have everything whatever you want, pay the price and have it”.
In a nutshell
After having a thorough examination of types of parenting styles, authoritative parenting style is the best parenting style among the four styles of parenting. This parenting style has high responsiveness and demanding resulting in proud
Types of Parenting Styles
By: Prof Ajmal Dass Jaipal